This is a reflective post written by our member Sue Kettle. Sometimes, it can be quite hard to integrate all that we take in on weekend trainings. As Sue says, remembering to be mindful can be like a dance- back and forth, drifting from moments of mindfulness to moments of distraction. However, Sue raises a significant point. It is so important to approach this dance with an attitude of kindness… and simply allowing whatever is present to be present is the first act.
So, it was all so easy when I was away for the weekend.
Just sitting on that cushion with someone else in in charge. Not really knowing what was next, or what was about to be said, relaxing and going with it. I kind of got a feeling, an inkling, of what perhaps they meant by beginners mind …
And in a group, there’s something that makes it easier to be kind to yourself, almost like it’s OK just now, because everyone else is trying it, too. And wouldn’t you just wish that to everyone really, being kind is a given, it’s not really an issue… so somehow then you can sneak yourself in there too…sneak underneath the corner of that blanket of kindness and compassion.
A truly lovely weekend… And then I came home…
Home to needing to make dinner, and get it right at work and choose what to say to my husband, and look after my lovely child… all these things.
And then, suddenly, everything becomes all very important again. When someone is taking charge of me, it seems, I can relax and be open to new things, new experiences, new ideas, space. But as the responsibility is passed back to me, in comes this ‘oh so important me’ … and suddenly I am trying again. Trying at many things. And with that comes the monitoring and reprimands and forcing harder . . . . .
What to do? I suppose, just notice it, allow it there, notice it, and stay with the breath. There is something very beautiful in allowing myself to be human! There is something very peaceful about not trying to force these things away, or give in to them in despair – ‘It’s just me, what can I do!’ Just allowing, and accepting, and not getting overly involved.
Its feels like quite a journey. It makes me wonder how everyone else is doing after their weekend away, and want to wish everyone well, wherever they are.
So I guess this is a kind of, ‘Hi everyone, quite a thing isn’t it, I hope you are all keeping well along the way, have a lovely December.’