My own personal journey with healthy living started at school when I was labelled as ‘chubby’ and I have battled with my weight ever since.  My weight tends to fluctuate – I was very skinny in my teens, hardly eating anything, to filling out a little more in my twenties. When I was pregnant I was absolutely huge and it took me a long time to lose weight and get fit after having children, especially, after having 2 caesareans. It seems the muscles in my abdomen permanently went on strike. Keeping my weight down throughout my thirties and forties involved a lot of exercise and restricting my diet – which made me miserable. And then there was the menopause!!  At this point it seems my thyroid decided to go on a real go slow – it still is – so into my sixties it is a constant battle to keep the weight down and stay fit.

Thanks to my love of swimming and walking and my dedicated practices of yoga, tai chi and qigong, I am able to maintain a reasonable level of fitness. Nowadays my intention and motivation is around eating healthily for my body, whilst eating foods I enjoy, together with doing movements I love without killing myself in the process. I’ve come to a place of more balance and acceptance.

Last year I attended the Mindfulness Based Healthy Living Course and what resonated deeply was – finally – a sense of ‘not my fault’.  It’s not my fault that my thyroid has slowed my metabolism.  It’s not my fault that I managed to knacker my knees jogging in my forties.  It’s not my fault that my body is slowing, ageing – all I can do is my best with the knowledge and practices I have.

Ki James who co-leads the course and is an expert in nutrition within the NHS, gave some very practical advice and information about the causes and conditions which might impact our health, which isn’t our fault.

One thing that is extremely important to me is rest and sleep.

In my forties I had a very high powered job combined with some challenging times and was stressed all the time. I couldn’t see it at the time, but now I am suffering from the effects of sustained and suppressed stress. Having discovered mindfulness practices I have learned to slow down, to pause, to rest and to stop doing and to just be for a while.  At least this goes towards mitigating against any current stresses – and allows a pause for some of the old stress to release.  I have also discovered hygge (pronounced ‘hyoo·guh’) and love nothing more to snuggle up under a cosy warm blanket in the evenings, and rest and do nothing. Bliss!

Compassion practice was a revelation, as finally, here in my sixties, I can actually sit here and offer myself some kindness.

I do wish that I had learned more about Mindfulness and Mindful Movement when I was younger. But as Pema Chodron says – ‘Start where you Are’ and at least I am doing it now. Better late than never as ‘they’ say.

As for Yoga and Qigong – these have been absolutely transformative for me. To reenergise my body with short sequences of Qigong makes me feel alive and free and vibrant. Research tells us that just 10 minutes of Qigong increases our serotonin and just 7 minutes of kindness or compassion practice increases oxytocin in the blood stream – both of which are beneficial to wellbeing.

I might have taken the long route, a bit later than I would have wanted, but I do feel that I am doing all I can to maintain as healthy lifestyle as possible.

Yes of course I have lapses – after all chocolate was invented to tempt me, but the Mindfulness Based Living Course helped me to be kind to myself, manage my lapses and get back on track to mostly living healthily.  In life I believe in the 80/20 rule. We can never be perfect and to do everything 100% perfectly can just cause us more stress and striving, but giving it 80% seems a fair balance to me.

One final reflection – I used to teach Mindfulness and Qigong at a large UK spa.  I remember a moment that really struck me. The place was full of posters advising you to get thinner with liposuction and a high powered exercise class to lose weight. I watched people barely able to walk as they left the class. There were other posters with young, slim, fit women toned with unusually smooth skin because they had a certain facial and use a certain cream.  I realised how much the media tell us we are not good enough. And there was me in the Mindfulness class encouraging people to be accepting and allowing and to move their bodies with kindness and gentleness with Qigong.  We are bombarded with images of how we should be, which feeds any existing feelings of ‘not good enough’.  I’ve learned that a healthy way of living should be about balance with a gentle approach, remembering its not our fault how our bodies are. Then looking at small steps as to how we can make any healthy changes we want to. Maybe its time to take on board the ancient advice from the Yogic tradition – the principles of ‘ahimsa’ – which symbolises love, care and compassion (including speech and thought) towards all beings.  And that includes ourselves! 

Mindful Eating

In the hustle and bustle of our daily lives, we often find ourselves mindlessly consuming meals, barely registering the flavours, textures, and nutritional value of the food we eat. Often we are overwhelmed with conflicting information as to what actually is healthy for us or the right food, right time, right diet.

The mindfulness-based healthy living course encourages us to reconnect with the act of eating, fostering a deeper appreciation for the nourishment our bodies receive. By practising mindful eating, we can become more attuned to hunger and fullness cues, make healthier food choices, and develop a sustainable relationship with food that goes beyond mere sustenance.

Mindful Sleep

Quality sleep is the cornerstone of overall well-being, yet it remains elusive for many in our stress-ridden society. Mindfulness techniques, such as guided meditation and deep-breathing exercises, are powerful tools for calming the mind and promoting relaxation. By integrating these practices into a healthy living course, individuals can learn to create a conducive environment for restful sleep, ultimately improving their energy levels, cognitive function, and emotional resilience.

Mindful Movement

Exercise is a crucial component of a healthy lifestyle, but the benefits extend beyond physical fitness. A mindfulness-based approach to exercise emphasises being fully present in the moment, tuning into the sensations of the body, and cultivating a mind-body connection. This not only enhances the effectiveness of workouts but also transforms exercise into a meditative practice. By incorporating mindfulness into physical activity, we are more likely to stick to their routines, experience greater satisfaction, and reduce the risk of exercise-related injuries. Research informs us that just 10 minutes of a gentle practice of Qigong is sufficient to increase our seratonin levels which bring about a greater sense of calm and wellbeing.

Stress Reduction: Finding Calm in the Chaos

Chronic stress is a pervasive issue in modern society, contributing to a myriad of health problems. Mindfulness, with its roots in ancient meditation practices, has proven to be a powerful antidote to stress. Through techniques like mindful breathing and meditation, individuals can learn to navigate life’s challenges with greater ease. A mindfulness-based healthy living course equips participants with practical tools to manage stress, promoting emotional well-being and preventing the negative impact of chronic stress on both mental and physical health.

Nature

Conclusion:

In a world that often pulls us in multiple directions, the Mindfulness-Based Healthy Living Course offers a compass to navigate the journey towards optimal health. By incorporating mindfulness into our approach to eating, sleep, exercise, and stress management, we can foster a harmonious relationship with our bodies and minds. Ultimately, this transformative experience empowers us to make sustainable lifestyle changes that promote not just longevity, but a life lived with intention, presence, and vibrant health.

These practices have helped me on my journey. I would love to share with you to help you on yours. I am teaching on the next Mindfulness Based Healthy Living Course and am looking forward to working with Ki and together offering you effective and personalised strategies to lead a more healthy life aligned more fully with your personal values. Whether it’s exercise or mental wellbeing there will be opportunity to share in peer groups which I found very supportive throughout the course. The home practices are also very beneficial to keep momentum going.

You might like to try this short self compassion practice (5 minutes – which comes from the course) – or a longer version (30 minutes) to begin cultivating kindness towards yourself.

Find out more about the Mindfulness Based Healthy Living Course here – or you might be interested in Mindful Qigong and ‘start where you are’ today.

Jacky Seery

The problem lies in implementing these healthy lifestyle intentions in our busy and often stressful lives and making them stick.

have you recently set a new intention to start a new healthy habit? Are you sticking to it? Have you lapsed and given up?

The problem is the human condition, which is habitual and driven by desire. Much of the time our habits and the deeper psychological forces that are driving our habits and desires are unseen. Until we turn towards and accept these forces then the possibility for change is limited and we set ourselves up for failure.

Key principles for making a new habit stick are, one habit at a time, intention, motivation, inevitable and repeated lapses and turning towards the underlying psychology.

Our mindfulness practice can be helpful to cultivate clarity and self-awareness around what we are actually doing. Slowing down and paying attention to the thoughts, emotions, sensations and attitudes can be really helpful in those moments before, during or after a lapse.

The practice of RAIN can be particularly helpful here, when we:

Recognise – noticing what is happening while it is happening;

Allow – allowing our internal experience to be as it is;

Intimate attention – paying close attention to and allowing:

our thoughts and thinking patterns; our emotional feelings; how the body feels; and how we are relating to our experience; and then

Non-identifying – zooming out to a wider perspective in which we are not out experience, but our experience is ever changing and moving through us.

Our compassion practice can also help us to recognise the challenges of the human condition playing out in our busy and often stressful lives. Instead of beating ourselves up when we don’t meet our healthy lifestyle intentions we can offer ourselves some compassion by:

Turning towards and acknowledging that which is difficult;

Recognising that the human condition is messy and that we are driven by many causes and conditions that we did not choose; and

Choosing to be kind to ourselves.

This creates the conditions for recognising and normalising the lapses in our intention, so that it becomes less of a big deal and so it is easier to get back on track again, without recrimination.

Our insight practice is also of us as we familiarise ourselves with the workings of the desire and grasping that underpin and fuel our habits. We apply the antidote of compassion and look directly as a way of generating insights into the underlying psychological forces that drive us.

We have brought together these ideas and others in developing our Mindfulness Based Healthy Living course. In this course you choose the habit you want to change. We provide you with a range of mindfulness-based tools and strategies to support the change in an atmosphere of kindness, common humanity and non-judgement.

Here are some comments from past participants:

“The title of the course made me fearful that it would be judgemental and proscriptive….it hasn’t been”.

“Feel more in control of me, the ups and downs, the successes and failures, they happen, the changes are helping me lose soe weight, that’s the reason I started this journey”.

“It made me develop a much moderating sense of the importance of self-compassion. I feel much equipped to continue on this journey of feeling so much better”.

If this is something that is of interest to you, our next course takes place online on over eight weekly Tuesday evening sessions beginning on OCTOBER 20th – 22nd at Samye Ling. FIND OUT MORE ABOUT THE COURSE HERE

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• Heather also teaches on our Masters degree programs, please CLICK HERE for more information.

Initially, I found it quite tricky to regulate my breathing, as part of my yoga practice, as the concept seemed very alien to me and I hadn’t really thought about my breathing before this time, other than in biology lessons…..my body just breathed. I learned about the four phases of breathing: breathing in, pausing with the breath held in, breathing out and pausing with the breath held out. I also learned and practiced different ratios of breathing, such as square breathing, with the same count for all four phases of breathing.

I came to understand that the nervous system could be relaxed and blood pressure reduced by lengthening the out breath, relative to the in breath. Conversely, that the nervous system could be activated and the blood pressure increased by lengthening the in breath, relative to the out breath. This is because the out breath stimulates the parasympathetic nervous system and the in breath stimulates the sympathetic nervous system.

I learned different styles of breathing, such as alternate nostril breathing, in which we breathe out and in through one nostril and then breathe out and in through the alternate nostril, alternating nostrils breath by breath. This practice is very useful for managing stress and anxiety and can also lower blood pressure and heart rate. Square breathing, or a breathing pattern with a longer out breath can be combined with alternate nostril breathing for additional benefits. We include this practice in our Mindfulness Based Healthy Living Course when we explore rest and sleep.

Then when I began learning meditation with Rob Nairn, nineteen years ago, I learned the settling the mind exercise, which we use at the beginning of our mindfulness sitting practice as a way of settling the gross activity and distractions of the mind. In this practice we breathe a little deeper, which stimulates the parasympathetic nervous system and then regulate the breath so that the in breath and the out breath are a similar length. We use counting or phrases to support us in regulating the breath. A count of 3 or 4 or 5 as we breathe in and a similar count as we breathe out. Or we say to ourself a phrase such as, “this is an in breath” as we breathe in and “this is an out breath” as we breathe out. We do this for about five minutes to balance the nervous system, not too aroused, not too relaxed.

Rob’s settling the mind exercise relies on the theory of ‘energy follows focus’. If we are focussed on thinking we put energy into the habit of thinking and the mind is distracted. If we are focussed on a strong focus in the present moment, such as regulating breathing with counting or phrases, we put focus and energy into present moment attention and take it out of thinking. This creates the conditions for the mind to settle. This is a key part of mindfulness sitting practice in our Level 1: Being Present in depth mindfulness course.

When I did my first mindfulness eight week course I learned the three stage breathing space, which is a daily life mindfulness practice which takes a couple of minutes and enables us to move from doing mode and auto-pilot into being mode and mindfulness. If we do this practice at set times during our day, it becomes a habit of daily life mindfulness. It is especially useful for stressful moments in our day. The middle stage of the three stage breathing space is a focus on breathing within the body, which grounds us in the body and connects us with our present moment experience of breathing.

I later learnt coherent breathing from Charlie Morley. In this practice you breathe in for six seconds and breathe out for six seconds. I have a recording on my phone that is an audio track of dings taking place every six seconds. When the ding happens the breath is turned from in to out and on then next ding from out to in. This practice soothes the nervous system down after about ten minutes. I find that it creates a sense of safeness that supports a compassionate approach to life’s difficulties. I have found this practice especially useful for getting to sleep, or getting back to sleep if I wake up stressed or anxious about something. I also find it relieves pain, in my case headache pain that I get occasionally. I sometimes do coherent breathing at the start of my morning practice as an alternative to Rob’s settling practice.

Then in my Mahamudra training in India with Tai Situpa Rinpoche, the main breathing practice has been relaxed square breathing. Breathing in to a comfortable count, hold in for the same count, breathe out for the same count and hold out for the same count. The emphasis here is to do the practice without any strain and to not block the air channels when holding the breath in or out, just to pause the diaphragm.

Using the breath skilfully to support our mindfulness practice is a key element of the Mindfulness Association’s approach to mindfulness. We also use a compassionate breathing practice in our Mindfulness Level 2 – Responding with Compassion course, as a way of building the inner resources of our compassionate heart, before embarking on the compassion practice of tonglen. In tonglen, we imagine transforming the suffering we breathe into our compassionate heart into an energy of compassion that we then breath out. It is our most powerful compassion practice and very useful for the most difficult times in our lives. These practices are a key element of our Living Well to Die Well course.

Having a range of breathing techniques at my fingertips supports me to live mindfully and with compassion. It is especially useful in the face of pain, suffering, stress and anxiety. If nothing else, it is something to do when I feel helpless to do anything……and I always feel better after a breathing practice.

Kind Wishes

Heather

You can find out more about coherent breathing on youtube where you will find soundtracks to try it for yourself.

Heather Regan-Addis is a Founder Member and director of the Mindfulness Association.

Heather delivers training for the Mindfulness Association on our two Post Graduate Master’s degree courses as well as on our regular courses in Mindfulness, Compassion, Insight and on our Teacher training programmes.

“ Second, the world and all it’s inhabitants are impermanent.

In particular, the life of each being is like a water bubble.

It is uncertain when I die and become a corpse.

As it is only the truth that can help me at that time, I must practice now with diligence.”

“Third, at death there is no freedom, and karma takes its course.

As I create my own karma, I should therefore abandon all unwholesome actions,

and always devote my time to wholesome actions.

With this in mind, I must observe my mind stream each day.”

This has made me realise that anyone I love could die at any time, as could I. This had made me more appreciative of the people with whom I share my live, because they are here today. It has also made me more appreciative of my own life and motivated to live as fully as I can for the benefit of myself and those around me. Also, I believe that when I die, or when someone I love dies, that it will be less of a shock and I will be better prepared to support myself and them through the process – time will tell.

The question of approaching death has been a taboo one in our culture and society and so potentially makes communicating about death and dying more challenging. However, it makes it more of an important question to address because so much suffering is caused by culture and society’s attitudes of denial and fear. Also, how to make the Tibetan Buddhist wisdom around death and dying more accessible to those of all faiths and none.

This is the challenge that faced myself and my collaborator Jacky Seery in developing this course. We have drawn a range of different sources from experts in the field of approaching death skilfully, such as Stephen Levine and Bronnie Ware, as well as research papers in the field. Then we have applied mindful reflection to topics such as regret, gratitude and our intention and motivation if we had a year to live. We have also drawn in compassion practices, such as tonglen, compassionate image and the self-compassion break that can support us in turning towards that which is difficult with kindness and care.

To further my own knowledge in relation to the suffering of old age, sickness and death, I am training as a hospital chaplain and currently have a placement working two days a week in a large teaching hospital.

The main themes of the living well to die well are:

• Cultivating qualities of stable presence and self-awareness, joyful curiosity and cheerfulness and compassion;

• Reflecting on life, including our intention and motivation (if I had a year to live), living without regret, moving from resentment to forgiveness and relating to pain;

• Reflecting on death, including stages of death, regrets at time of death, planning for our own peaceful and purposeful death and supporting others in their death; and

• Sharing experience of practice, reflection and death.

The feedback from our first course has been very positive and suggests that participants have really valued a safe space within which to explore and talk openly about death and dying. They also valued a balanced approach to a difficult subject within which the inevitable difficulty was normalised and held with compassion.

Heather Regan-Addis

If this is something that is of interest to you, our next course takes place at Samye Ling or online on the weekend of 7-9 July, followed by six online evening sessions over the course of a year. You can find more information HERE.

There is a taster session which members can attend at our upcoming membership weekend, free to our members, on 10-12 March 2023. You can find more information HERE

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• Heather will be teaching an eight week Mindfulness Based Health Living Course online on Tuesday evenings from 18^th April – you can read more about that HERE.

• Heather also teaches on our Masters degree programs, please CLICK HERE for more information.