Reflection on Humility
by Heather Regan-Addis
Humility is considered a crucial virtue in various spiritual and religious traditions including Buddhism and Christianity and cultivating humility is a way to live well, to age well and to die well. As we get older and move towards our death, we will all inevitably experience a diminishing in our ability, physical and mental, and will experience a loss of much of the status and power that we may have derived from our youth, our work and our salary. This can be a painful process made more difficult by ego-pride but eased by humility.
This week I have been studying humility, as an antidote to ego-pride and entitlement. Ego-pride and entitlement are rife in our culture and society and can arise from a belief that if we are successful then there is something special about us and therefore we are better than others. When we reflect deeply on our successes, then we can begin to see clearly that they are a result of myriad causes and conditions, many of which we did not chose and which are way beyond our control. This opens up the door to gratitude and appreciation for these causes and conditions and genuine compassion for those who do not have such good fortune.
I have been working with the destructive emotions, including ego-pride, for over a decade as part of the Level 3: Seeing Deeply Insight training, but until recently have found it difficult to recognise my own ego-pride and entitlement. It has been painful to experience as it required a letting go of the sense that I am special in some way that others are not. It required me to recognise that I am just one human being among billions, all struggling to be happy and to not suffer. The successes in my life have led me to think of myself in my life as a hero and not as a ‘normal’ person. This has been reinforced by my role as a meditation teacher, in which people tend to look up to me and project special qualities on to me. It has also been reinforced by the idea of being a Bodhisattva, a warrior of compassion, committed to relieve the suffering of all sentient beings over many lifetimes.
Over the years, I have identified with and cherished the glorious heroes of the stories I love. Frodo in the Lord of the Rings and the Gryffindor House heroes in Harry Potter. More recently I am beginning to cherish and wish to emulate Frodo’s constant companion Samwise Gamgee and the qualities of Hufflepuff House. Samwise Gamgee is defined by his unwavering loyalty, immense courage and selfless devotion to Frodo. As a down to earth hobbit he provides emotional strength, optimism and practical wisdom, acting as a sturdy, loving companion. Hufflepuff is the most inclusive of the four Hogwarts Houses, valuing a student’s loyalty, patience, fair play, hard work and willingness to learn, rather than specific aptitudes like brilliance or ambition.
What Samwise Gamgee and the Hufflepuff qualities have in common is the quality of humility, which is an antidote to ego-pride.
The etymology of the word humility comes from humilis, which literally means “on the ground” conveying a sense of Sam’s down to earth-ness. Humility is the honest assessment of one’s own abilities, limitations and worth, involving acknowledging imperfections, remaining open to feedback and treating others with respect. It is not a lack of confidence or self-worth, but instead is secure and grounded in honest self-awareness, open-mindedness and a recognition that all of us have equal value, regardless of our successes or accomplishments.
In Tibetan Buddhism, the Seven Points of Mind Training or Lojong, is taught to reduce ego-fixation, through following the teachings of the Lojong phrases and practicing Tonglen. It is a good training for cultivating humility. One of the practices we explore on the Living Well to Die Well training is Tonglen. So why not join us for our next Living Well to Die well course, you can find more information here
