this is the recipe of life

said my mother

as she held me in her arms as i wept

think of those flowers you plant

in the garden each year

they will teach you

that people too

must wilt

fall

root

rise

in order to bloom

by rupi kaur

On a lockdown day that felt particularly hard going, my dear fellow-poetry-lover friend sent me this small poem by the Indian-born Canadian Sikh ‘Instapoet‘ rupi kaur. Although she’s only in her late twenties, she’s published three bestselling books of poetry which she’s also illustrated, and has millions of followers on her Instagram account. I guess her words strike a chord with many!

This particular poem certainly hit a note in me, and linked into the feeling of missing my mum in Holland who I haven’t seen for way too long. It’s simple comfort and sense of hope moved me, and it also connects with the joy of early spring rising and blooming… I guess it comes back to radical acceptance and the paradoxical theory of change. As R.D. Laing says: “There is a great deal of pain in life and perhaps the only pain that can be avoided is the pain that comes from trying to avoid pain…”

Wilting and falling may just be part of the process, but at least let’s meet ourselves with much care and kindness in that process, and where possible, also allow others to hold us. And we can always rejoice in our compassionate motivation for the blooming of ourselves and others!